On Clothes and What We Wear

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Remember when I used to do the What We Wear series on the blog? You might be wondering what happened with that, (or you might not be but anyways), here is a little ramble on that. I started that as a still-new mom and thought all moms including myself need some motivation to take time out for themselves and feel better about themselves through the way they dress. I noticed it was common to lose yourself for a while when you became a mom, and realized I felt so much better when I put a little thought into what I wore. I wanted to inspire other moms but I have to admit, I was uncomfortable doing it. I may write about a variety of things, but blogging about style or what we wear is definitely not something that lies in my comfort zone. For me, What We Wore, was more about experimenting and looking at our wardrobes another way. Somewhere towards the middle of it though, I wasn’t sure how it was coming across and ultimately I guess I just lost interest in it.

Recently, I’ve felt a bit differently towards it all. In the past couple of years, I’ve loved browsing through stores randomly (in-person and online) whether I needed something or not. It felt exciting to find something I loved on these spontaneous shopping trips. At some point though, it started feeling a bit pointless. I mean, we have limited time in our days (and our lives for that matter) and is randomly browsing through stores for the slight chance of finding something great, really how I want to spend the free time that I have? I realized I want to curb on this urge to randomly browse through stores/online ones too for that matter, and instead maybe use that time more productively. Time spent randomly shopping means lesser time (and energy) for family, experiences, friendships, passions and hobbies, and appreciating all that we already own.

As a mom, I want to teach my daughter, ‘You matter, the kind of person you are, not what you look like’ and to teach her that, I first have to live like that. In the past year or so, Anya has really started noticing what she wears, and has already started looking for people’s approval. One day we had a handyman coming over and as soon he entered she looked at him holding her skirt and asking him, how do you like my skirt? And I was like WHAT? I realized that even though we all say we dress up for ourselves, and maybe to an extent we do, when our focus shifts on clothes and what we look like too much, we do love hearing people’s compliments. We love looking at ourselves from their point of view. And what do you do if you don’t’ get that? I want to teach my daughter instead that you are beautiful because of the kind of person you are inside, and that you don’t need every single thing you want in order to look and feel good. You can learn to be creative, love what you own and creatively express yourself through your clothes without always wanting to buy more. That style is from within, it is yours whether you are always wearing the trendiest of clothes or not, it is in the way you pull the outfit together even if it consists of items you have owned for years.

During the time that I did that series, I noticed what people wore a lot more, even cringed at moms that seemed to be in mom-jeans or yoga pants all the time. It’s hard to admit this but I began to judge people by what they wore and whether they had made an effort into their outfits or not. And that’s not what I want to be. I want my mind to be occupied by better things, by people’s personalities, their stories, not the clothes they put on day in and out. And I want to teach my daughter that too, that at the end of the day, her mind and her heart matters much much more than her clothes and what she looks like.

Let me just say it like this, I’m not saying I close my eyes to beautiful style and trends or shopping anymore; my pins on Pinterest will speak for themselves. I just want to be more thoughtful about random splurges and not let shopping for clothes take over more of my life (and mind) than it should. Instead I do want to have a list of items that I really need, and only go focused on those items. I absolutely love being able to creatively express oneself through your clothing choices and I looooove the power of makeup. I always feel better about myself when I have made a little effort before getting out of the house. But I don’t want clothes and shopping for them to take up more of my life and mind than they should.

This is kind of a ramble and all over the place, but I just wanted to get these thoughts out.

Thanks for reading and lots of love.

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